"None Shall Pass"

I'm not quite sure how this one came to me...but I think we have hit a Monty Python moment in American politics. I say this because the scene in Monty Python & the Holy Grail when King Arthur encounters the Black Knight I think symbolizes greater then any other example of where our two political parties are today. King Arthur represents the Republican party on it's quest to take back the country. The Black Knight represents the Democratic party currently in charge of the executive & legislative branches. King Arthur in the movie is relatively clueless at this point of his journey & is still working on gathering his knights. He comes up to the all powerful Black Knight & asks to cross his path. The Black Knight replies that "none shall pass". A battle ensues. King Arthur first cuts off one of the Black Knights arms (Gov of NJ), then the other...(Gov of VA). The Black Knight says that they are "mere flesh wounds" & continues to fight on losing one leg(Senator of Mass) & then the other(the 60th vote)...now merely a stump the Black Knight keeps yelling at King Arthur that he's not giving up(Health Care Bills, Cap&'Trade) & clueless King Arthur continues on his quest. The question now is will King Arthur ever find his Knights(new leadership) or will the Black Knight regrow his appendages & rise to regain control...stay tuned...

America Wins!!! America Wins!!! /"I drive a truck"

For the record I don't want either party in charge of the House, Senate & White House. The key significance of the election in Mass. the other night is that it puts things slightly back into balance. Regardless of what party you belong to this win is better for America. There is a reason why we have a separate House, Senate & Executive branch. It's to keep everyone in check so neither party shoves their pet projects down our collective throats. Any time there is a lack of balance it hurts most of us whether we want to admit & believe that or not. Only by the system functioning properly can we at least somewhat stop all the laws & pork projects going on in the backdoor deals. Now for those of you that are truly upset about this...I hope you can find consolation in the fact that this was just a "local" issue & that there is nothing to worry about. You know(channeling Caroline K) like you know those minor Gubernatorial races in NJ & VA. They were like you know...just local. In the long run this will actually more likely help Obama's administration IF he plays it right. So the real question here is...is he a left-wing political ideologue or is he a sharp pragmatic politician. It's a question that he seems to have been trying to avoid answering. The Mass election has changed that & he now will have to answer that question...through actions & deeds & not mere words. I think it is also high time he realizes who his real enemy is that is setting him back the most. It's that Vlad, Dear Leader, Mahmoud, or Hugo nor is it Rush, Dubya, Dick, or Sarah. It's Nancy P. She undermines him every chance she gets...in public. Obama is the President & leader of the Democratic party, yet Nancy seems to be driving the bus. Obama needs to get her in line & start representing him & his policies to the party & keep her "deep thoughts" to behind the scenes meeting with Harry, Barney, etc...It's been a year. It's time to stop blaming the past administration, get your own house in order, reach out across the aisle & lead!

I don't know much about Scott Brown, his policies or his background. I heard that he has an interesting back story & I did like we he had to say in his acceptance speech. I did find it interesting that it sounded more like a win for the Presidency then a Senate seat. One thing we all know is that he drives a truck. I think it''s safe to say that Big O's comments about that didn't go over to well with everyone in Mass. I'm sure some fellow travellers sitting in their Ivory Towers loved it..but it seemed to rile everybody else up. Coming across as a snobby elitist is not going to keep Obama in the While House in 2012...it might just put Barbie(guess who) & Ken in the White House in the not too distant future...

If you are planning on flying & blowing yourself up...

For those of you who have just totally had it & have come to believe that jihad & specifically blowing yourself to pieces & your fellow infidel travellers on an airplane is the only way to leave this word please take note of the following...just in case your cell leader has not informed you of current changes in airport security the US Government with the support of the US media have been kind enough to share the following info...

Do not fly from the countries on the list in this article http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20100104/ap_on_bi_ge/us_airline_security They are on a special list for extra security. So please fly from Western Europe. The UK, Germany, & the Netherlands all seem to be pretty accommodating.

Do not carry the following articles http://www.tsa.gov/travelers/airtravel/prohibited/permitted-prohibited-items.shtm Please remember...

No sharp objects! No knives, steak, Swiss army, Gerber etc..., box cutters, nail-clippers,etc..(the plane will provide you with plastic knives, forks, & spoons that with minimal training can be highly effective weapons)

No guns! Seriously...if you are this stupid please find another cause (http://www.acorn.org/ is hiring. Knowledge of prostitution & tax evasion are pluses...but not requirements...they provide training)

Keep liquid explosives in multiple 2oz tubes(as many as you can jam into a small Ziploc...DO NOT LABEL!!!)

Not sure if the terror watch list is available yet...but when it does this website will have & it's full of other helpful hints http://www.aclu.org/keep-america-safe-fre

Now...while the info above should come in handy... before you actually decide to go through with this you may want to take into consideration the following

• Is it really that bad that this is the only way to find any worth in yourself? Have you tried volunteering to help others to see if that gives you any satisfaction?
• Have you considered what this will do to your family...friends...fellow country-men/women, followers of your chosen faith...etc..?
• Are you that sure you will have 60+ virgins waiting for you? Are you confident you could handle them all? If they are virgins have you taken into account...they are virgins!...they may not know what they are doing! If they are in Paradise what if they are eternal virgins...the hymen keeps growing back & they never know what they are doing! The reality of trying to juggle dozens of women...have you ever juggled any?
• If you fail...do you really want to be the next "shoe-bomber", pantie-bomber"...end up the bra-bomber, diaper-bomber, depends-bomber?!? & end end at the bottom of a missile silo somewhere in America's heartland...talk about a living hell...!

If you are dead set to do this...can I at least suggest a trial run.? Do it by yourself, in a desolate abandoned area with no one (no animals either...check for strays) around...you know, just to make sure your chosen explosive delivery device works ...

Bang...Zoom...to the Moon!

I think I may just have to come with a solution to Gitmo that will make Conservatives, Liberals, our friends around the world, & even the "current inhabitants" of Gitmo happy ...we send them to the moon! Now this may sound like crazy talk...but it's not. In the lovely Marius Hills there is a lunar lava tube that is 260 feet deep(amazing views from rooftop terrace!) & 213 feet wide(cute & cozy minimalist space) http://www.cnn.com/2010/TECH/space/01/01/moon.lava.hole/index.html . Now if this is where we are planning to put our scientists to study the moon...it should be good enough for those at Camp Gitmo(3 meals a day, unlimited Tang, free shelter, freedom to practice religion, grav-free exercise, free healthcare, etc..). Now we can close Camp Gitmo to please the Liberals, appease the Europeans(always works out great...WWI, WW2, Bos-serb, etc) be acceptable to Conservatives, & the "inhabitants" of Gitmo should be satisfied with the opportunity to get closer to God/Allah. It's a win-win for all!

Ultimate Fitness 2010!!!

Yes...it's that time of the year again when everyone & their Mother's 3rd cousins ex-lovers friends neighbor has decided...this is the year I'm joining a gym & getting back in shape! They all go to the gym right after work...for about three weeks ruining it for the rest of us & then they quit.l. If you fall into the aforementioned category you may want to skip the rest...this is not for you. However, if you live a relatively healthy lifestyle & going to the gym is just part of your regular weekly schedule read on. Please note...this applies regardless if you lift weights, cardio, classes, yoga, Pilate's, swim etc...of course you should be doing at least 2 or more of the above & looking for new ways to challenge yourself, attack your weak points, or just plain spice up your work-out. If so I stumbled on to this super new & exciting work-out program while actually at the gym on the cross-trainer http://flirtygirlfit.com/dvd_collections.html I feel stronger & sorer in places I never hit directly before, I'm more flexible & developed new skill sets that will come in handy outside the gym in various real world situations that I never thought that I could do...but now can! So step on up to the plate & start the new you workout today!

He's Just Not That Into You...

Well...I think at this point in time it's safe to say that "he's just not that into you". You tried...you reached out your unclenched hand in friendship to him...& he ignored it, slapped it away & spit on it...because he quite simply just isn't that into you...You're just not his type. You see...he just sees another American...the fact that you may not be another old white guy with gray doesn't matter to him...he doesn't care that you're the first African-American president. Doesn't care about your multi-cultural background or history...he just sees another American President. His background was most likely nothing like yours...I doubt he spent much time on an Island Paradise being raised by loving Grandparents or went to a top school in the must multi-cultural & greatest city on Earth. He just doesn't get you...nor does he want to. You see he is the puppet for a Theocracy & they need an evil to keep the masses under control(in all fairness...not the only ones who have done this to various levels & degrees). We represent their greatest fears (again referring to the current govt...not the people...they are dying in the streets fighting to finally overthrow the current leadership) & they need as as their "Devil" or Great Satan as they like to call us. He needs you, your predecessor, & your successor as his enemy to thrive...as a friend you weaken him & his masters.

Now...if you're upset he doesn't like you...you really are not going to like the fact that he must hate your wife. Don't take it personally...it's not just her...I'm sure he hates Laura, Hillary, Condi, & Sarah. He hates them because he is outright terrified of them. Because whether you are a fan of the current First Lady, her predecessors, & the other women mentioned they all share certain things in common such as that they are all strong, intelligent, & successful women(again you may not like all named but if you think any of then are weak, stupid, & unsuccessful...then you are an idiot & do not understand the definition of the words used to describe them). Between the First Lady being a success in her own right & the guns hanging off her shoulders & the success of the former Governor of Alaska & her ability to shoot a rifle...they must shake in their seats out of abject fear & most likely excitement as well that makes them feel "funny" in their nether regions. And the last thing they want is a country full of women like them much less someone who came from the outside to be voted into the ultimate seat of power like you did. Do you get it now...he's just not that into you...

So...you need to find a new strategy. Playing nice isn't going to work. That doesn't mean you need to go right in with a Military solution but if you cannot come on strong & get our "other" friends to play nice & use sanctions...you will need to do something. A good start may be speaking up for the Neda's http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,528441,00.html of Iran. The people shout your name in their streets & their leaders accuse you of being the problem even when you don't speak up. So start using your oratory skills & show their people that we back them. Then maybe some of the European leaders will & maybe this will eventually put the pressure on them to change their ways. Otherwise it's either a series of air strikes now(I don't think there is a chance of the Israeli's not hitting their reactors this year with a US "green light" backed by US & UK intelligence & possibly AFSOC & SAS support)...or the loss of a city(ies) later followed by a less then pleasant option...either way...deal with the fact that Ahmadinejad is just not that into you...