He's Just Not That Into You...

Well...I think at this point in time it's safe to say that "he's just not that into you". You tried...you reached out your unclenched hand in friendship to him...& he ignored it, slapped it away & spit on it...because he quite simply just isn't that into you...You're just not his type. You see...he just sees another American...the fact that you may not be another old white guy with gray doesn't matter to him...he doesn't care that you're the first African-American president. Doesn't care about your multi-cultural background or history...he just sees another American President. His background was most likely nothing like yours...I doubt he spent much time on an Island Paradise being raised by loving Grandparents or went to a top school in the must multi-cultural & greatest city on Earth. He just doesn't get you...nor does he want to. You see he is the puppet for a Theocracy & they need an evil to keep the masses under control(in all fairness...not the only ones who have done this to various levels & degrees). We represent their greatest fears (again referring to the current govt...not the people...they are dying in the streets fighting to finally overthrow the current leadership) & they need as as their "Devil" or Great Satan as they like to call us. He needs you, your predecessor, & your successor as his enemy to thrive...as a friend you weaken him & his masters.

Now...if you're upset he doesn't like you...you really are not going to like the fact that he must hate your wife. Don't take it personally...it's not just her...I'm sure he hates Laura, Hillary, Condi, & Sarah. He hates them because he is outright terrified of them. Because whether you are a fan of the current First Lady, her predecessors, & the other women mentioned they all share certain things in common such as that they are all strong, intelligent, & successful women(again you may not like all named but if you think any of then are weak, stupid, & unsuccessful...then you are an idiot & do not understand the definition of the words used to describe them). Between the First Lady being a success in her own right & the guns hanging off her shoulders & the success of the former Governor of Alaska & her ability to shoot a rifle...they must shake in their seats out of abject fear & most likely excitement as well that makes them feel "funny" in their nether regions. And the last thing they want is a country full of women like them much less someone who came from the outside to be voted into the ultimate seat of power like you did. Do you get it now...he's just not that into you...

So...you need to find a new strategy. Playing nice isn't going to work. That doesn't mean you need to go right in with a Military solution but if you cannot come on strong & get our "other" friends to play nice & use sanctions...you will need to do something. A good start may be speaking up for the Neda's http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,528441,00.html of Iran. The people shout your name in their streets & their leaders accuse you of being the problem even when you don't speak up. So start using your oratory skills & show their people that we back them. Then maybe some of the European leaders will & maybe this will eventually put the pressure on them to change their ways. Otherwise it's either a series of air strikes now(I don't think there is a chance of the Israeli's not hitting their reactors this year with a US "green light" backed by US & UK intelligence & possibly AFSOC & SAS support)...or the loss of a city(ies) later followed by a less then pleasant option...either way...deal with the fact that Ahmadinejad is just not that into you...

Great Balls of Fire...

I'm not really sure what level of absolute total insanity you have to be to stuff a condom filled with PETN a high explosive in your panties(& you're male) & then inject it with a hypodermic needle loaded with something like nitro-g to blow yourself & a plane full of innocent civilians up. The only other people I can think of this crazy sit on top of a nuke & explode it underneath themselves with the help & support of their co-workers. Of course they are called Astronauts & their goal is to continue man's insatiable drive to explore & find ways to further enrich our lives. These men could not be any further apart which is why I ask how can some men have such incredible courage to take the risks that an Astronaut takes to better mankind while others are so weak, crazy, despondent & pathetic that they would do such harm themselves physically & psychologically & to others...?

Since much has been written already on this I'm not going to go to deep into Janet N claiming that the Homeland Security policies worked (then stating they failed...oh really!?!)...they failed miserably. We got lucky ...again. The last time we got so lucky was 2-26-93. The WTC was hit by a car bomb in the underground garage. 6 people were murdered & over 1,000 wounded(not really so lucky after all). It wasn't what worked...it was what didn't work..the explosive device. If it did 300+ on the plane would have died along with whatever damage the raining debris from the plane caused. On top of this it has been reported that guests of a certain hotel that starts with a G in sunny Cuba who were released were involved. The Imam that a certain Army Doctor who worked at Ft Hood (up until his shooting spree) also seems to be involved. Playing nice, being politically correct & trying to rehabilitate these poor lost souls doesn't seem to work too well. While Armed Force is not the only answer...it is a highly effective tool when used properly. We can't keep "hoping" that this will stop, that people will like us (Clinton was President in 93 & was well liked globally as was his predecessor Bush Sr & we still got hit) & we keep getting lucky. We need to wake up & realize that it's not going to go away until the International community no longer accepts it, rises up against it crushes it while simultaneously the leaders & the common people within the communities that produce these fanatics start taking steps to stop their children from having their minds poisoned by religious fanaticism & turned into human weapons killing innocent civilians & accomplishing nothing but creating news headlines while putting their own families & friends lives at risk from certain retaliation. So much for me not going too deep...

Avatar 3D Digital Deep Thoughts

Magical...might be the best way to describe the experience of seeing Avatar in Digital 3D. It would have been a great Sci-Fi flick in 2D, but in 3D it's out of this world. I've literally never seen anything quite like this (must be the equivalent of what is was like for our parents & grandparents when they saw the Wizard of Oz) & I'm a pretty big movie buff. Star Trek was awesome..but that was like watching a great movie...Avatar in 3D is like being immersed within the world of Pandora(the planet in the movie) while riding on a roller-coaster. I think it's safe to say that with this movie & the technology created to make it (he wrote the story 15 years ago & spent over 4yrs developing the technology to film it...something to be said for taking ones one to do something right vs just rolling out garbage ...P.S. this applies to the Financial community & Government (both parties) to appease the masses) will both save & revitalize the theater going experience. While more & more people are watching movies on their 50+ plasma via netflixed blu-ray tech...a movie like this really needs to be seen on the big screen...so kudos Mr. Cameron. Kudos as well to Zoe Saldana as the female lead(between this & Uhura in Star Trek she's the new Sci-Fi action hottie..& she can act) Sam Worthington as Jack Scully who seems to be the hero in every other film out now, Michelle Rodriguez playing like no other a mean latina chica Michelle Rodriguez (is she our female Tom Cruise?!?even though Ben Stiller does do Tom better then Tom in all fairness) & of course the Grandmother of action sci-fi heroines Sigouney Weaver.

I think it's safe to say that you don't even need to like Sci-Fi to enjoy this movie. With the exception of very young children, Sci-Fi haters, & English Lit majors who become critics who think movie's like Antichrist are fine art & are what the movie experience is about...this movie should appeal to most everyone else.

Now one thing I do feel I need to point out is that there is a fairly heavy handed Liberal "air" to this film. While I agree with the Eco spin that we shouldn't be destroying the forests to rip open the earth to mine it's resources for monetary gain...trying to allude that this is like America's adventure/misadventure in Iraq by representing Humanity as a bunch of greedy smarmy Haliburton employees backed up by Blackwater muscle (portrayed as mean, roided-out retards...led by a misguided gung-ho psycho {played brilliantly by Steven Lang...he's turning into the new Robert Duvall/Clint Eastwood old school harda$$ these days}) with some tree hugging scientists who "just don't get it" out to rape resources from the humanoid inhabitants of Pandora the Navi(think what if we evolved from Felines, were blue,very tall, lean supermodels & lived liked the American Indians of the Plains) who inhabit a rain-forest like lush gorgeous vibrant biologically diverse world with the deserts of the Middle East & it's local residents (the House of Saud, ex-house of Saddam, & the Mullahs of Iran don't seem to mind pumping their precious black gold out of the ground & selling it to various multi-nationals to refine for them to fund their various "causes) & using phrases like "terror for terror" & shock & awe tactics as utterly ridiculous & ludicrous. Better examples would be what the Europeans did all over the world, what China is doing in Africa today & what we, the USA did via United Fruit to Latin America. Actually the best analogy would be what if the Russia of today's Gazprom(Russia largest company & worlds largest extractor of natural gas) & it's private Army(yes it actually does have it's own) backed up by mercenaries comprised primarily of ex-Spetnaz (Russia's Special Forces) troops looking for new blood after Chechnya traveled through time (shockingly...no time travel in a Cameron Sci-Fi flick) back to the North America of the 16-1700's & tore up the countryside for it's natural resources while slaughtering American Indians might be a somewhat more accurate analogy. Next time Jim...either be a bit more subtle & thought provoking with your political messages or save them for dinner party conversations with your fellow travellers at your 20,000 square "carbon foot-printed" compounds that you arrive at in your Hummer "gas-guzzling" Limos to drink Jeroboams of imported French wines while being served gourmet imported delicacies vs. locally sourced food...reality really is a b.....ain't it just?!?

OK...now that I got that out of my system...absolutely amazing movie experience that not only has mind numbing crazy awesome special effects but a good story as well. The movie just keeps getting better & better the whole time as more of the world of Pandora is revealed...enjoy...& then go & see it again! As a very special holiday gift to my readers here's the link to the first scenes from the sequel (it's actually Spoiler Free... http://g4tv.com/attackoftheshow/comedy/69494/Best-of-Olivia-09-Avatar-Parody-Trailer.html)

Dudette...where's my 89th Air Wings Boeing 737?!?

Whatever happened to "practice what you preach" & leading by example?!? Maybe...just maybe if we followed these simple basic principles we wouldn't be in the mess we are in. Regardless the great leaders of the world both elected & not have descended upon Denmark to save us all (or at least one poor little Dutch girl being attacked by ever form of extreme weather simultaneously...I guess her brother Hans Brinker's fingers are stuck in the wall so he couldn't get to her) from total & imminent disaster. Oh my!!! Will this lead to the 4th+ Ice Age & then on to the 6th+ major extinction?!? I have an idea to help solve "Climate Change". I'm nowhere near as mensa-level intelligent as many of the geniuses that gathered in Copenhagen but let me throw it out there...

Let's put an end to these summits until our great leaders figure out a way to do it without flying on Military (yes you Nancy) & private aircraft that burn loads of oil while polluting the skies, getting driven around in gas guzzling carbon emission spewing Limousines from their grand "carbon footprinted"suites & eating gourmet food shipped, flown, driven in from all over the world. My radical suggestions are below

• Fly commercial in economy(P.S. don't call stewardesses bI-atches...yes you Schumer)
  
• Use shuttle van service
• Stay in a standard size room
• Eat locally sourced & produced food(drink water...non-bottled)
  
• Stop burning hundreds of $$$$$$millions$$$$$$ in taxpayer dollars when we are in a recession
• Have Mugabe present his speech from his leopard skinned gold plated throne room using PowerPoint
  
• Fund America's Da Vinci the one & only Al Gore to create & develop new technologies where people can communicate from afar using both voice & video in radical new ways( Yes they already exist...but so did the Internet & Ice Ages before he "discovered"them & gave us world peace).
• Have some real plans & ideas that might actually work
  

Again my ideas are very radical & to even fantasise, perchance to dream that our Solomon like world leaders (much less the elected ones) would subjugate themselves to such grueling & inhuman conditions just to save Gaia(mother-earth) or Hans sister is just crazy talk...but if they don't...

The First Layoff...

Lately the topics of the recession, the economy, & unemployment (10+% is the number reported, but the real number is closer to 20% (after a year out...you are no longer counted, which means 1 in 5 of you are un/fun-employed) come up all the time...so it made me wonder what ever happened to working for the same firm for all if not most of your career like our fathers & their father before them...when it hit me just who the first poor slob to get Fired, Riffed, Downsized, Laid-off, Pink-Slipped, etc., was ...none other then Lucifer. That's right, the first guy to lose his job was Jack Scratch, The Devil, Satan! As legend would have it the first guy to lose his job was due to a disagreement with Senior Management in the form of the sole proprietor of the firm...God. The story of why seems to vary between Lucifer wanting God's job, to him being jealous of God's love of man to he wanted to force man to be good while someone else (another Angel? JC?, his brother JC?!?) wanted man to have free will. Regardless of why, he was God's favorite...his right hand man. Unlike the Senior Management of firms like Bear & Lehman who fell from grace Lucifer was truly a "Master of the Universe".

Now this is where it gets tricky. While on the one hand Lucifer lost his job...with no chance of EVER being rehired...much less a reference (Yes...he worked here. Start date?...creation. Termination date?...a long, long time ago) he started his own firm from the ground on...down. He hired his own staff, developed his own marketing strategy & created his own business plan. George Costanza was obviously not the first guy to "do the opposite of everything!" Which for better or for worse(depending on your point of view) has been fairly successful throughout recorded history. So whether or not you believe in a divine being, if he has a son, if there is a counterpart to said divine being, take comfort from this story at least in the form of an allegory...that no matter how bad or high you fall...no matter how much you thought you were "a Master of the Universe" you very well may end up landing an even better job then you had...you may even start your own business that may give your previous employer a run for his money. And by chance if you ever run into your previous employer & he asks.."hey did you really need to compete directly against me after all I did for you!?! You can always reply(with a smile on your face) ..."the devil made me do it"...

Tiger...Tiger...

Tiger...Tiger burning oh so bright...
Tiger...Tiger lying lying thru the night...
What immoral hands & thighs
Could frame thy fearful symmetry?

In what distant deeps or skies
Burnt the fire of thine eyes
On who do you oh so perspire?
Whose hands grasp you while on fire?

And what shoulder & what art
could twist oh poor Erin's heart?
And when her heart began to beat
Oh how she beat you with hands & feet!

What the hammer? what the chain?
Where exactly was your brain?
What the anvil, what dread golf club in her grasp
Dare her deadly terrors clasp

When the stars get thrown down by their peers
and water the newspapers with their tears
Did He smile over His works to see?
Did He who made the babes make thee?

Tiger...Tiger burning oh so bright...
Tiger...Tiger lying lying thru the night...
What immoral hands & thighs
Could frame thy fearful symmetry?

Please find my inspiration from the orginal by William Blake http://www.bartleby.com/101/489.html